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24
skyscrapers
April 24, 2012


Looking at the skyscrapers in the distance...funny how their shadows fall on me...why do I feel ok in the shadows...trying to get to the city limits...thinking this will save the day...only to get where I thought I should be but only the feeling of disappointment again...will I ever not be this way...how did I get here...choices? is my heart just not that pure? I want to collide with the maker of the stars and the heavens...could i just rest with Him for one fleeting moment...all this would go away...skyscrapers torn away forever...but what about the sledge hammers..and the doom sayers...and the ones that say be a man...take my hand...as I move forward I call out for mercy...will she find me...mercy please find me tonight...fall on me forever...don't let my heart go...if death warmed over me who would care...does it really matter though...gravel in my hands...pouring through....one stays stuck to my palm...like a seed...enough for my life...what is my life...i want to change the world...can I get up off the couch...i want to save the day but look at the filth of my life...grace...sometimes I feel grace is too costly for me...i have no clue how much it all cost...i step over it everyday in route to the things I want...will i learn...wow this sounds like such pain but really it is so remarkably beautiful....this is life...different views...seasons...seconds...hours...days...i asked to be shaken...didn't know it would cost me everything...didn't know I would find remnants of so many things here...moving on...i've been issued a new life...i want to break free from the spaces that everyone wants to put me in...im learning the fine art of drowning...but this drown victim doesn't see it as death but as taking in the beautiful parts of life...i want the inside of my body to explode with every possibility that I was created for...for every amazing thing i've ever seen...for every ounce of light that shined on me...that reflected on me...I want to harness it...i want to stand with a mirror and blind people with the things that matter in life...most will look away because it's so bright...but some...very few will be drawn to the colors...to the sounds...mercy calling...skyscrapers in the distance...they look small from here...will the brightness of you carry me...if i grow blind will you be the shine in my eyes...if i forget what it means to die to myself will you shake me...if i fall down...will you pick me up...or at least lay next to me...talk to me...tell me that all of this matters...all of it is important...all of this is just glimpse of this heart...

 

3 COMMENTS | POST A COMMENT

On Wednesday, May 23, 2012, Kara S. said
Tony, You're so gifted! The site is amazing and creative. The pictures and words are thought-provoking. This is my first "blog" experience :) Sorry that it took me so long to finally see it. Prayers that the right people see it....

On Friday, April 27, 2012, Gareth Unruh said
Tony! Love your heart!

On Wednesday, April 25, 2012, Sasha said
Hey this is really amazing! Really touched me today! Thank you for sharing.


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